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Showing posts with label emo. Show all posts
Showing posts with label emo. Show all posts
Wednesday, August 22
Wednesday, November 30
Monday, November 28
essays
essays oh essays..
how i wish you can type on your own..
how i wish that i can think of that sentence and you just type it yourself!!
how i wish you know what i'm thinking so i dont have to think so much!!
essays oh essays!!
i have no mood to deal with you
cause i'm in my holiday mood already...
Thursday, November 3
i'm such a failure
people say they are stress in their works..
people say they are stress in their assignments..
people say they are stress in their exam..
people say they are stress in their projects..
people say they are stress in their family..
people say they are stress in their relationship..
people say they are stress in their studies..
people complain and complain about their work, study, uni, family and relationship....
i tell you what i'm STRESS about is TALKING!!...seeing other people talking like they are best friend even they dont know each other..they can just talk and talk and talk all day!!!
like just what happen today the lecturer ask me something i cant even speak out..i dont even dare to speak, i dont even dare to talk to my course mate as well!!! and my course mate were like asking other course mate to help out... WHAT A FAILURE I AM!!
i hate it when i cant talk or express myself by talking out!! ..when seeing people talking when they like known each other for years and years even they know them for the first day...i hate it that the situation cant happen to ME!!!
i know i'm a INTROVERT!! but i did try to speak out, i did try to talk but just that i cant!!! is kinda HARD!!!
this is what i've been fighting for so long!!...but it's just me i cant talk!!
i so WANT TO TALK!! BUT I CANT EXPRESS MYSELF IN TALKING!!..
everyday weeping myself to sleep
everyday weeping myself to forget
everyday weeping myself saying it will be alright the next day
everyday weeping myself that i will try even harder
Wednesday, October 26
REALIZATION!!
awesome i'm in a state of realization!!!
i realize something that was there all along..in the past i realize something that is right in front of me but i dint want to know more about, dint want to ask about it, due to that to particular thing it has blinded me...
it has blinded me for so long and i even fell for that trap, for that some thing i realize has trap me and blind me, and i'm so stupid to fell for the trap...
may be is because i want to try it out, want to experience it, want to know how it feels, want to get hold of it...
it all when smoothly until that day came, until it came and i actually experienced it, that i actually felt it before, that i actually tried before, that i actually hold on it before...
it took me for few month to come to the state of realization that it's not worth fighting for when it's not worth going for...it make me realize back at that time, the thing i realize before was actually true, was actually going on, but i realize it was me that ruin the thing i realize...
it was me ruin something i should not have done, it was me that should not exists in that particular thing, it was me that should not have come between....
how can i be so blind, cornered, trap in that situation where i realize that situation happen long ago, how can i be so cruel, how can i be so greedy, how can i be so blinded, how can i not REALIZE IT !!!
i'm sorry for being exists at that time, letting you suffered, cried, demotivated, sorry to get it the way...
now that i'm gone, and i no longer exists in that surroundings, it that situation, i pray and i hope that was forgotten and never remember in that surroundings and in that situation ever again...
and i realize it did happen!! awesome!!! i'm no longer related to it!! i was forgotten!!!
note to self : next time if i realize something and my heart has the glitch to it...better not make the next step to come between that again!!!
i realize something that was there all along..in the past i realize something that is right in front of me but i dint want to know more about, dint want to ask about it, due to that to particular thing it has blinded me...
it has blinded me for so long and i even fell for that trap, for that some thing i realize has trap me and blind me, and i'm so stupid to fell for the trap...
may be is because i want to try it out, want to experience it, want to know how it feels, want to get hold of it...
it all when smoothly until that day came, until it came and i actually experienced it, that i actually felt it before, that i actually tried before, that i actually hold on it before...
it took me for few month to come to the state of realization that it's not worth fighting for when it's not worth going for...it make me realize back at that time, the thing i realize before was actually true, was actually going on, but i realize it was me that ruin the thing i realize...
it was me ruin something i should not have done, it was me that should not exists in that particular thing, it was me that should not have come between....
how can i be so blind, cornered, trap in that situation where i realize that situation happen long ago, how can i be so cruel, how can i be so greedy, how can i be so blinded, how can i not REALIZE IT !!!
i'm sorry for being exists at that time, letting you suffered, cried, demotivated, sorry to get it the way...
now that i'm gone, and i no longer exists in that surroundings, it that situation, i pray and i hope that was forgotten and never remember in that surroundings and in that situation ever again...
and i realize it did happen!! awesome!!! i'm no longer related to it!! i was forgotten!!!
note to self : next time if i realize something and my heart has the glitch to it...better not make the next step to come between that again!!!
Monday, October 17
我是一个爱哭鬼！！
听到这首歌就想到你了！！
我很想你！！我真的真的很想你！！
你知道吗？？！！ 你知道吗，我还很想你
我还没放手，我不想放手。。你知道吗，这是我第一次那么深深爱一个人
想念你的微笑，想念你的声音，想念你的拥抱
想念你啊！！！
Tuesday, August 23
save me
my soul is trampling, my body is shaking, my heart is aching
i just know that the scar in my heart will not mend back as fast as i thought it will be..
save me....
lonely nights, weeping nights, restless nights,
letting go is a easy way to do, forgetting will the hardest for me
i try and try slowly slowly eventually it will forget in my mind
my heart is aching, my heart is shaking,
one more bad move it turns to pieces
letting someone i love so much, care so much,
hurting my heart again and again until the stage of never mending back
save me.....
save me from this, heart breaking moments,
save me from this, heart aching moments,
save me from this, cold darkness heart,
i have love someone that i have not love some one before,
you were the first, and the first to break my heart again and again,
it's been 7th month seen that day, my heart is slowly mending back
by the laughter of my friends, by the warmness of my family,
by the care of my sister, by the days i had gone through without you
but there is always a hole in my heart that could never mend it back,
that hole will be yours, and yours only
a memory, a pass, an experience that i would never forget,
as loved and forever will to you
lonely nights, weeping nights, restless nights
how life is great when you are care free,
how life is great when you have no doubts,
how life is great when you have no problems,
(this are all common human beings asking oneself)
but 1 thing i would like to ask myself...
'HOW LIFE IS GREAT WHERE I'M THERE FOR YOU (MY FRIENDS)'
i always keep to myself, seeing my friends happy, i'm happy
seeing my friends weeping, i'm sad
seeing them prob-ling, i'm useless...
i also want to help my friends,
i'm always conscious about my friends, there are my life,
people asking me, why do i go all out when my friends need help,
when they ask me for favor, while some of them just take you for granted,
i told to myself, i don't mind them taking me for a granted,
i just hope one day they will remember me,
and will be there for me, like i'm there for them.
for me friends are second warmest to family,
for me friends are second helpful to family,
for me friends are second joyful to family,
that why i cherish them so much even they mistook me
even they back stab me, even they make fun of me, even they hurt me
but one thing i know is that may be someday it will change
and accept me more than just being a friend, a close friend.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Sunday, August 7
what are there??
what are there??
what are my goals??
what are my mission??
WHAT WHAT WHAT!!??
what are the definition of goals??
what do i need to hit??
the pass month i have set a goal, but is not exactly my mission. i know how my parents love the country side. when we all when for a month holiday in UK, the trip mostly bring backs the memories of my parents when they were in Toronto for studies, how they enjoy their life they, how they went through.
when me and my bro was walking on the grounds of my sis university and my dad keep saying to us that study here then get a job then got a PR, got a house and my parent could retire and come live with us in UK. i know that's my dad wish, and dream and as a child to them i really want to grand them that wish, make their dream came true.
that's what i'm aiming now to make my parents dream come true!!...i know that is possible
but what is my real mission in life, i have been on so call "vacation" for a month..i've been backing out, i've been loss, don't really know what i want from here, don't really where to go next???
i don't wanna stuck in the middle of no where, i don't want to stay on the road that leads to no where..that is definitely not what angels of peace are to do...
i need to move on to a new goal!! resolve my mission again!! i need to get back on track!!
Thursday, July 7
half way around the world
AH! just few more days and i'm flying off to uk...
day has past and i'm getting excited, cant wait, but it makes me more of not wanting to let go..
i'm half way around the world, and you're there so far, where i cant reach you in miles...
letting you go it's the hardest things to do, but remembering you it's the most easiest thing to do..
it makes me missing you even more, more than ever!!
day has past and i'm getting excited, cant wait, but it makes me more of not wanting to let go..
i'm half way around the world, and you're there so far, where i cant reach you in miles...
letting you go it's the hardest things to do, but remembering you it's the most easiest thing to do..
it makes me missing you even more, more than ever!!
Sunday, June 26
Shhhhh ;-X
Justin Bieber - That Should Be Me ft. Rascal Flatts
Ouuuuuuu
ouuuuuuuu
Everybody's laughing in my mind,
Rumors spreading 'bout this other guy,
Do you do what you did when you
did with me?
Does he love you the way I can?
Did you forget all the plans
that you made with me?
'cause baby I didn't!
That should be me,
Holdin' your hand,
That should be me
Makin' you laugh,
That should be me,
This is so sad,
That should be me,
That should be me,
That should be me,
Feelin' your kiss,
That should be me,
Buyin' you gifts,
This is so wrong,
I can't go on,
Till you believe that,
That should be me
Ouuuuuuu
ouuuuuuuu
That should be me,
Yeah,
You said you needed a little time
For my mistakes,
It's funny how you used that time
To have me replaced,
Did you think that I wouldn't see you out at the movies
Whatcha doin' to me,
You're takin' him where we used to go,
Now if you're tryin' to break my heart,
It's working 'cause you know that,...
That should be me,
Holdin' your hand,
That should be me,
Makin' you laugh,
That should be me,
This is so sad,
That should be me,
That should be me,
That should be me,
Feelin' your kiss,
That should be me ,
Buyin' you gifts,
This is so wrong,
I can't go on,
Till you believe that,
That should be me
I need to know should I fight
For our love for this long
It's getting harder to shield
This pain in my heart!!!
That should be me,
Holdin' your hand,
That should be me,
Makin' you laugh,
That should be me,
This is so sad,
That should be me,
That should be me,
That should be me,
Feelin' your kiss,
That should be me,
Buyin' you gifts,
This is so wrong,
I can't go on,
Till you believe that,
That should be me,
Holding your hand,
That should be me,
Oh i makin you laugh, oh Baby,
That should be me,
(that should be me givin you flowers)
That should be me,
Talking by hours,that should be me, that should be me,
that should be me
Never should've let you go,!
I never should've let you go,!
That should be me!! <3
Never should've let you go
That should be me!!<3
Ouuuuuuu
ouuuuuuuu
Everybody's laughing in my mind,
Rumors spreading 'bout this other guy,
Do you do what you did when you
did with me?
Does he love you the way I can?
Did you forget all the plans
that you made with me?
'cause baby I didn't!
That should be me,
Holdin' your hand,
That should be me
Makin' you laugh,
That should be me,
This is so sad,
That should be me,
That should be me,
That should be me,
Feelin' your kiss,
That should be me,
Buyin' you gifts,
This is so wrong,
I can't go on,
Till you believe that,
That should be me
Ouuuuuuu
ouuuuuuuu
That should be me,
Yeah,
You said you needed a little time
For my mistakes,
It's funny how you used that time
To have me replaced,
Did you think that I wouldn't see you out at the movies
Whatcha doin' to me,
You're takin' him where we used to go,
Now if you're tryin' to break my heart,
It's working 'cause you know that,...
That should be me,
Holdin' your hand,
That should be me,
Makin' you laugh,
That should be me,
This is so sad,
That should be me,
That should be me,
That should be me,
Feelin' your kiss,
That should be me ,
Buyin' you gifts,
This is so wrong,
I can't go on,
Till you believe that,
That should be me
I need to know should I fight
For our love for this long
It's getting harder to shield
This pain in my heart!!!
That should be me,
Holdin' your hand,
That should be me,
Makin' you laugh,
That should be me,
This is so sad,
That should be me,
That should be me,
That should be me,
Feelin' your kiss,
That should be me,
Buyin' you gifts,
This is so wrong,
I can't go on,
Till you believe that,
That should be me,
Holding your hand,
That should be me,
Oh i makin you laugh, oh Baby,
That should be me,
(that should be me givin you flowers)
That should be me,
Talking by hours,that should be me, that should be me,
that should be me
Never should've let you go,!
I never should've let you go,!
That should be me!! <3
Never should've let you go
That should be me!!<3
Wednesday, June 22
i guess it's time
well............
i guess it time to let go, dragging it for so long and it's really heavy, the rock behind my back, the sack hanging from my heart, it's just to heavy.....
everyday i been doing my prayers from day til night, non will just drop from my body, unless I TOLD MYSELF TO LET GO!! only it will let go....
if not i will never it let go, never see my real side again, where i use to be, one person doing the things i like being free dont have to wear a mask to have people...
even my closes friend giving me complains on why am i wearing a mask to face everything, why cant i just face it like i use to - the old me, making her worry all the time, telling me the more i do this the more i got hurt...
well....
is not i want to, it just so hard to let go, i know there is so many things i dont know, being stubborn and not to realise it that the situation that the answer is just right infront of me...
may be i just need to get hit by something or get scolding by someone just to realise it, can say that sometimes i can be very thick...
may be i dont want to realise it, just to hide it, so i wont get hurt even more, dint you know scropio they dont wanna to see the things that hurt them they rather hide them, doesn't what to share the burden keeping all to them self...
任賢齊 - 心太軟
i heard this song when we got back from the trip and it really really hit me i sang and i cry in the car, no want notice (thats good) if not they will be so worry about me and i dont want that to happen
the lyrics was so clear and easy to understand and it really really deep down it touches me, i really need to let go, stop playing tricks to my head and just JUST LET IT GO!!!
i guess it time to let go, dragging it for so long and it's really heavy, the rock behind my back, the sack hanging from my heart, it's just to heavy.....
everyday i been doing my prayers from day til night, non will just drop from my body, unless I TOLD MYSELF TO LET GO!! only it will let go....
if not i will never it let go, never see my real side again, where i use to be, one person doing the things i like being free dont have to wear a mask to have people...
even my closes friend giving me complains on why am i wearing a mask to face everything, why cant i just face it like i use to - the old me, making her worry all the time, telling me the more i do this the more i got hurt...
well....
is not i want to, it just so hard to let go, i know there is so many things i dont know, being stubborn and not to realise it that the situation that the answer is just right infront of me...
may be i just need to get hit by something or get scolding by someone just to realise it, can say that sometimes i can be very thick...
may be i dont want to realise it, just to hide it, so i wont get hurt even more, dint you know scropio they dont wanna to see the things that hurt them they rather hide them, doesn't what to share the burden keeping all to them self...
任賢齊 - 心太軟
i heard this song when we got back from the trip and it really really hit me i sang and i cry in the car, no want notice (thats good) if not they will be so worry about me and i dont want that to happen
the lyrics was so clear and easy to understand and it really really deep down it touches me, i really need to let go, stop playing tricks to my head and just JUST LET IT GO!!!
Tuesday, June 21
Wednesday, June 1
我根本就放不下 (T.T)
听见那声音；
如此收悉，如此陌生。
一字一句，但不再是当初的温暖鼓励。
望着那眼神；
如此温柔，如此深情。
温柔眼神，但不再投射于当初那个人。
感受那呼吸；
如此温和，如此遥远。
深深呼吸，但不再为某人存在而呼吸。
感觉那体温；
如此冰冷，如此抽象。
回忆过去，但不在能亲身感觉那体温。
看着那背影；
毫无温度，毫无情感。
距离虽近，但不再是当初那厚实的肩。
听着脚步声；
如此轻盈，无畏蹦驰。
仿佛述说，没有某人的日子如此快活。
时间滴答滴答的走，
有些人却怯步停留。
是因为…
是因为……
因为你的心里还有着一个他。
想把他抽离，却又如此不舍。
他的一举一动，离不开视线。
放了吧~傻瓜……
你真的愿意花上青春，
等着那个不可能的他？
傻瓜……
看看身边，
也许会有一个一直默默守护你的 * 天使 *~
如此收悉，如此陌生。
一字一句，但不再是当初的温暖鼓励。
望着那眼神；
如此温柔，如此深情。
温柔眼神，但不再投射于当初那个人。
感受那呼吸；
如此温和，如此遥远。
深深呼吸，但不再为某人存在而呼吸。
感觉那体温；
如此冰冷，如此抽象。
回忆过去，但不在能亲身感觉那体温。
看着那背影；
毫无温度，毫无情感。
距离虽近，但不再是当初那厚实的肩。
听着脚步声；
如此轻盈，无畏蹦驰。
仿佛述说，没有某人的日子如此快活。
时间滴答滴答的走，
有些人却怯步停留。
是因为…
是因为……
因为你的心里还有着一个他。
想把他抽离，却又如此不舍。
他的一举一动，离不开视线。
放了吧~傻瓜……
你真的愿意花上青春，
等着那个不可能的他？
傻瓜……
看看身边，
也许会有一个一直默默守护你的 * 天使 *~
Tuesday, May 17
being emo
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
那最后一次的吻~
我会记得~
那最后一次的拥抱~
我会记得~
那最后一句我爱你~
我会记得 T.T
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
